6 Funny Things (Indian) Bosses say (and the thoughts that run through my head when I hear them)

5 years of corporate life & there’s never been a dull moment.

Think your satisfaction at work is defined solely by the money you earn or the job you do?

Well one cannot be more wrong… Job Satisfaction is linked to many other aspects – few as important as one’s immediate job environment. 

One’s workplace and its immediate environment is defined by one’s colleagues with the immediate superior acting as a crucial contributor to the same. (My inner goddess – MADdy  is signaling at me to restrict the gyaan at this point)

I  have had the most hilarious of encounters with colleagues and most importantly superiors .

Remember the time when you hear your boss dish out a line you’ve heard a zillion times & then you hear your alter ego whip out some wisecrack to counter the same? You’ve wanted to blurt the kick-ass rebuttal to his/her oft repeated line but didn’t and instead adopted a zen like facial expression instead?

 Na? Well maybe its just me (!)

Perhaps it all comes down to perspective & how your insane alter ego reacts to a perfectly serious & impressively grumpy man/woman  saying the following:

  1. ( When you join the company – most probably your first day ) “We have an open door policy”

Yeah?!  Is that why Mr. X stopped ranting about the politics at play within this company, the moment he spotted you?!

   2.  “ You are going to go far in this company, I can see it”

HOW FAR? And HOW? Why wasn’t my FAR REACHING Potential not on display in my annual appraisal eh?!

   3. “ Its all a team effort at the end of the day”

Uh Oh Uh Oh Uh Oh…What the hell did I do wrong for the TEAM to be blamed??!!!

   4.  LAST DAY OF WORK : “ You have grown so much since you joined us”

Really? Last I checked, I was still as podgy…If it was not about physical inches , why did I hear the line : “ When are you going to learn (to do things rite) ?”  from you, a day ago?

    5.  “ Get your ass here right now ” (Amazing how it made me chuckle when I heard      these orders being barked to someone else…only to have the same thrown out at me once)

Umm…how does one get ONLY one’s ass to the boss? Do I chop it off and lay it on the platter for you? Or do I enter the cabin backwards –butt first?

   6.  Deadline  : 5 pm…. You finish the project at 2 , and rush for approvals at 2 o clock – Boss is busy, 3 o clock – He is in a meeting , 4 o clock – Meeting’s still on,  4.30 – there are innumerable changes made AND you get to hear something on the lines of :  Why doesn’t anyone honour timelines out here? You really need to speed up your pace of working  ”

This is when my inner MADdy goes speechless & starts singing : My dream is to fly , o’er the rainbow so high!


3 Comments Add yours

  1. shayne says:


    1. Suraj says:

      Cant agree more!! and YES I could clearly spot my contri out there!

      1. marinaszone says:

        Yes Yes Mr. Iyer…take a bow!

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